I don't have a really complex or thoroughly worked out system or theology of prayer. It's pretty simple. The idea is that I'm supposed to be in a conversation with the Master of the Universe, Maker of stars, Craftsman of quarks, Architect of cellular structures and systems. So elements involved need to flow from that idea. I praise Him (that's really important for me – I need reminding), I ask Him for things (actually involve Him in the issues of my life and relationships), and I listen. That's pretty much it. Whatever I need to do to do that I make up and adjust as I go. The point is the conversation happens with my Master, not with my own mind.
As simple as that may sound, I'm not that good at it. This blog pours out of this conversation, and sometimes these entries have little to do with my Master. So how good was the conversation? Last night, as I was trying to fall asleep, I prayed again. The contents were praise, submission, and intercession; the result was peace; and I slept great. That was a good example. The prayer the night before described in yesterday's blog not so much. Sometimes when I intercede I sense things from my Master, a direction to pray, and I do. I don't always like this because I don't always sense what I want to happen. But I pray that way anyway.
These elements make what I do conversation; conversation with the Master of all. I believe I can speak with kings, princes, presidents, and ministers and be pretty calm about it. After all, how big a deal can they be after spending time with my Master? "I rule the nation of England, how do you do?" "Very well, your grace, I was just talking with the Master of the Universe about you. He is particularly fond of you." No sweat.
The question that I wrestle with when I pray is whether or not, or to what extent, my own imagination is filling in gaps. Those gaps could be important, and I certainly do not need to add voice to my Master's prompting. I have to guard against running imaginings about circumstances, people, or places. These things happen out of my fears, my desires to be accepted by people, and my desire for control over my environment. What I need is the perspective of my Master, the assurance of His attention, and the serenity of His presence in my life and these circumstances. After that, everything else is easy.
I can face people and circumstances just fine if I have the right perspective, the assurance, and the serenity. It often becomes abundantly clear I don't have any of these things. In those times I become keenly aware that I wandered out of the house without getting dressed in my borrowed, ill-fitting armor. I wish that happened less often that it does because I love prayer. Prayer is time when I feel the closest to my Master. Even prayer in a public setting is a great experience for me. Then I sense we are communing with my Master, not just me alone (I have no idea what is really going on in the minds of others, but it feels really cool).
Prayer also keeps me receiving from my Master's hand what He has for me, rather than manufacturing (or trying to manufacture) what I want. I am more apt to move and walk at His pace. I am more likely to wait for His supplies. I have more peace about what I don't see…yet. Submission is a very vital spiritual discipline for me. I have spent so much of my life pretending to be self-reliant and sufficient, and therefore foolish. Praying realigns my heart and mind on my Master's will and purpose. I may not see it yet, but I submit to what I do know and see; at least I do when I pray. Those are the times I am less a fool.
So, today I will specifically practice prayer. I will seek my Master and sit with Him. I will listen for His voice, look where He points, and thank Him for all He does. I will revel in the wonder of Who He is, wallow in the abundance of His love, marveling that He cares, or even knows, about me. I will jump on the bed of rest He provides and giggle like I'm six. When He is near, I will leap into His arms, sit in His lap, and tell Him the silly stories of my day. And I will sit at His feet to listen to His stories of people, His parables and fables, and seek to perceive His meaning behind them. How cool will that be?! I'm giggling already!
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