In Matthew 7 Jesus tells His disciples that whatever judgment and standard they use with others will be used on them. The idea is that they will refrain from judging others so they will not be judged themselves. Well, they have trouble with this concept, and so do I. I still judge pretty harshly. I feel it when I do, and thankfully I don't do it as often as I used to. It really stings my heart when I realize what I'm doing.
Yesterday, a friend took me to lunch and we went looked for a few geocaches downtown. On the way back we were talking about my impending move, and that I would be moving with my job intact. He said that by offering me this opportunity my managers really showed that they really appreciated me. I agreed and said that it surprised me they felt that way. I told him I had almost been fired twice, and we discussed why, which is when I admitted my addictive behavior that almost cost me my job.
That surprised him. But it also illustrated why I especially have no room to judge anyone. I do, and I hate that I do. Chambers is right on when he puts the culprit in my soul's pride. Even with the clear knowledge that I have an addiction and that this addiction nearly cost me my job, family, and so on, I would still judge someone else? For what? What could they have done that compares to that? I am truly dumber than any 12 other people I know.
Most of the judging I do revolves around things like grammar, using the right word rightly (pun intended), and silly mistakes. Well, I have damaged grammar too. If enough of these entries have been read, several examples can be found in most of them. And using the right word properly is another place I skate on thin ice. I guess far too often to be critical of others on this point. And silly mistakes is a category in which I have at least bronze if not a gold medal. So where is the space to boast or judge another?
Don't even get me started on spiritual things. Can I, who have known my Master since I was seven, and then enslaved myself to an addiction for over 20 years, really have any room to criticize another's spirituality? No! And yet I do. I look at people at church and wonder at their "authenticity". I listen to preaching and evaluate their thoroughness and knowledge, presentation style and ability. Seriously? Am I some great orator? Am I some great theologian or Bible scholar? Am I so authentic at church? I know church is rarely safe to be transparent. I know I don't know the Bible as I should, nor am I that thorough in my preparation of teaching. It's not like I have read the entire Bible through (the Minor Prophets are particularly difficult to get all the way through for me, short as they are). So what room do I have to judge anyone?
I have been to seminary and enjoy working with biblical languages. Does that make me smarter or better at Bible study? It probably should, but it really makes me more responsible, or responsible for more. I should be held to a higher standard. To whom much is given, much is required, and I have been given a huge amount. I don't think I can repay it. All I am conscious of is how much I am not doing as I study the Bible. I am aware of things that either I don't have the resources to do, or am not smart enough to figure out. I find my limitations, and know that I am responsible for pushing beyond them.
But more than that, and more importantly, the true standard of any believer is the same standard: submissive devotion to our Master. So, where my abilities lie, am I still submissively devoted and focused on my Master, or do I say, "It's ok, I got this"? Do I stop at what I can do in exegeting a passage of Scripture, or do I submit my rational faculties to my Master and let Him teach me what He inspired to be written? It comes down to the same thing for those educated formally in Scripture, or those self- or home-trained in Scripture. Do I submit what abilities and knowledge I have to the Master of all Knowledge and Power?
Finally though, Paul, my frustrating ministry buddy and role model, once wrote that he does not even judge himself (1 Corinthians 4:3-4). That really annoys me. I judge myself even more than I judge others. I can't even count the number of times I look at something I do or think and say, "That was dumb!" Instead he submits himself to His final judge. I'm not even competent to sit in judgment over my own actions? It would seem not. What would it look like if I submitted myself to the judgment of my Master in all the things I do? He would know more, see more, and evaluate me with more truth than I can muster. But He also died for my sin, was raised for my eternal life, and intercedes for me. It seems safer to submit to His judgment, regardless of the painful truth He would reveal. And I would probably judge others far less, if at all. Well, ok then, here I sit waiting for my moment in court with my Master. I think I'll read the end of Romans 8 while I'm waiting.
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