So, unwashed hands do not defile (cause to lose the quality of holiness), but the things in the heart coming out of the mouth. Jeremiah is told that the heart is deceitful and desperately sick (Jeremiah 17:9), so the words of Jesus in Matthew 15:18-20 make sense and shed light on the perspective of my Master. I may think that I'm fine, no problem on the inside, and that I can handle the moral conduct of today. But my Master believes otherwise; and has believed this for thousands of years (longer actually).
Is it odd to consider such a dim view of creatures He made? If I am so desperately sick in the heart, isn't my Creator partly responsible? How can I become so sick to such a core level without some of the responsibility being on my construction and makeup? It's my opinion, but I think the answer lies in following the pattern of my fore parents, Adam and Eve. When I broke faith with my Master, at whatever point that has happened along the way in my life, from childhood on up, my response was to hide it. I hid from my parents and from my Master, hoping to "get away with it" instead of owning it, confessing, and repenting.
It is true when I have been charged with being sorry I was caught, rather than being sorry for whatever it was I did wrong. And for me specifically, with the addictive patterns present in my life, this assessment of my heart by my Master is spot-on. It is in my heart for all these things to be true of me. I am capable of tremendous evil. It is the Spirit of my Master within me that brings purity, just like Chambers points out. The purity I lack is imparted to me through the Spirit rather than from within my own heart.
So, like the submission that brings righteousness, the presence of the Spirit of my Master brings purity from the wickedness in my heart. When I submit to His presence and work I discover that these impure things in my heart are washed away. They become uncharacteristic rather than my normal mode. But they have niches clearly marked and fitted for their return should I wander out of the submissive pattern of thought. My heart is fully capable of providing space again to those evil patterns of thought. I am dependent, not being trained or fitted for independence. The Spirit of my Master has become my "iron lung" and "dialysis machine." I will never again be able to wander far without a relapse into my desperate heart disease.
Gaining righteousness of my Master and purity is worth the sacrifice of my independence. My willful pride and selfishness does try to convince me otherwise, but the peace that comes from living within the will and care of my Master is a difficult argument to overcome. But the context of my life has always been the willful wild independence of this country, and this culture breeds it, idolizes it, and has little regard for dependence of any sort. Dependence is counted as weakness, and I don't like to be thought of as weak. But I am. No addict is strong. I think it is probably true that no person is strong, but I do know that as an addict, I am not. That I do know. So dependence suits me, regardless of what this culture teaches.
So, today I will submit my work, my dialogues with customers, with co-workers, and all my interactions with my wife to my Master, and His Spirit's work. And I will rest in the peace of His righteousness and His purity. I feel better already.
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