I figured Oswald Chambers would get here sooner or later. But he also goes as far as I've heard ministers go on the subject. In Romans 6:16, my ministry buddy, Paul describes the situation to the church members in Rome where what ever they give themselves to becomes their master, whether sin or obedience to God. Where Chambers goes with this is to run with the slavery picture Paul uses. So, to whatever I present myself as a slave into obedience, to that I am a slave. In other words, initially I choose to serve something (or someone) and after that choice is made, I am a slave without choices.
The first step of the 12 steps is, "We are powerless to control __________ and our lives have become unmanagable." This does not describe how we got there. The focus is on the situation at hand. The choice of masters has been made and I am a slave without choice, powerless, unable to manage my own affairs due to the clamoring of my master for my attention. For some this is alcohol, others it is narcotics, still others it is eating, shopping, sex, work, co-dependency, and then finally, my favorite category, "hurts, habbits, and hang ups." Whichever I choose becomes my master and all other pretenders for the position must wait, family, friends, work, and God.
Chambers cuts right to the heart of the step one when he points out that, "the first thing to do in examining the power that dominates me is to take hold of the unwelcome fact that I am responsible for being thus dominated." Where he does not go (in this entry anyway) is into what to do about it now. He says that only yielding to Jesus will break every form of slavery in my life, but how is that done? How is it that I make the transition or change in masters? After all, if I am a slave having once made my choice, I no longer have the ability to choose, even to choose another master. He says as much, but then concludes, as do so many others, with choosing Jesus. I can't! That's the point! I'm a slave, and yes it's my fault, but I'm still a slave. Accepting that I am to blame for being a slave to whatever doesn't magically change my allegiance. Something else must happen.
Slaves are freed in one of two ways. Either someone (including themselve) buys them in order to free them, or they escape. The latter is rarely a guarantee, and even the first one has dangers for some. Paul goes to great lengths to describe God's solution, in fact this may form the essence of the entire Book of Romans. God does act to free me from slavery. He redeems me through the action of His Son, Jesus. What Jesus has done is redeemed slaves, paid debts of the borrowers, taken punishment on Himself to appease the wrath earned by the guilty, achieved amnesty for the rebels, and balanced the requirements of justice reconciling the unjust with the justice of a Holy and Perfect God. He is a busy Person.
So, what's the problem? If Jesus has freed me from my slavery, why does it still have an effect? The answer is contained in the context of the verse, verse 16. I still choose. The action of Jesus freed me to choose again, but I still must submit to someone. What I do that causes me no end of pain and frustration is I try to dodge the problem by choosing myself, taking up my own mastery. The problem with this choice is that it is never really myself I end up choosing. Here's why. First I choose myself, life gets a little crazy and, like everyone, I need help. So I turn to something, it could be anything, for help. But the help I want is to feel better, something to ease the pain and discomfort of life. It is in the moment of that dependent choice that I again enter into slavery to something, whatever that something I imagine will make me feel better. By choosing myself, since I am not up to the task of controlling the circumstances of this life I live, I will always seek another.
Jesus' is not surprised here. Eventually, neither is Paul. What they both understand, and I am learning slowly is that I need to choose Jesus right up front to avoid the problems on the back end. When I do, the pains of this crazy life situation I live within does not go away, but the acceptance and dependence upon my Master Who loves me like crazy enables me to do what I could never do before. I can endure with peace, and experience a transformation of those circcumstances into opportunites to serve my Master. It's crazy to think that before I was still serving a master, but afraid to let anyone know I was a slave. Yet everyone I am around is in the same situation I am. We are all slaves to something, whether we like to admit it or not.
So, how do I choose Jesus on the front end? I believe two things are needed: 1) Practice, daily practice. Choosing every day, hour, and minute to practice choosing Jesus. B) Accountability. Remember, that for me, accountability is part of why I write this blog. This is not to say that I have been duped into believing that these are the only two things needed. There are other things, but all the options taken, whether 12-steps, or counseling, or any other option, all must contain the two I mentioned. These are the only two things that work for me. Now, let me also say that I have struggled for over 20 years to break free from my favorite smelly nasty dog toy of an addiction. Sure, I know I need those first two things, but while the first may be easy to say, it is extremely difficult to do. Once I fail in the first, it's really easy to circumvent the second. Then it is a short fall into the mire from which I can't rise on my own.
So, keep reading this, holding me accountable for what I write. When I miss day, please complain. It's not for you I write, but rather it is for me you read. I hope, and believe, that God will help us both, but I do not do this for others. If I did, I would want thanks, and attention, and "kudos", and whatever. I do this because I have to in order to maintain some semblence of sanity and connection to my Master. So, I thank you. If you comment or don't that's fine. The One I really want to please is my Master. I wish He would comment once in a while (or do I?).
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