Responding to Spiritual Failure

The garden event of the Crucifixion of Jesus is a very interesting scene.  If Jesus leaves an example to follow, this is one of those areas that His example is excruciatingly difficult to follow.  For instance, when His betrayer shows up, He says in Matthew 26:46, "Rise up, let us go; the one handing me over has arrived."  He makes the absurdly funny line from Mystery Men ("We have a date with destiny, and it looks like she's ordered the lobster.") seem right on point rather than absurd.

I imagine the scene as very late at night.  The disciples have been through a confusing stress-filled week, and are understandably tired.  Jesus asks them to pray, but instead they fall asleep.  They will never again have the opportunity to pray with Jesus during His most difficult personal battle.  In fact, right on the cusp of their most confusing and difficult time, they fall asleep instead of praying.  In short, they have failed spiritually in an important clutch point in their relationship with Jesus.  He can lecture them, reject them, call them out, and dismiss them, and many other things which would heighten their sense of failure, but what He says is, "get up, we have an appointment with my betrayer."  He still includes them in the events of the garden, leading to the events of His death.

The fact that there is no sense of rejection of those failed followers, and that He continues to include them in His passionate cup of suffering, leads me to feel a sense of security and peace.  But it also inspires me to listen for that next command.  Will He tell me to get up?  Will He tell me to go with Him?  What I do know is that He will continue to include me, even if I fail spiritually.  My failures, of which I have a long list, do not disqualify me for service to my King.  They may restrict what opportunities I have to do various acts of service, but they do not disqualify me for service to my King.  I am not released from my duties, I am not relieved of responsibilities, and I do not have license to lapse into bouts of self-pity and pouting rather than acts of service.  I am not shelved, and I do not have that option among my choices.

So, I will rise up, I will go with Him, and I will move on with Him to the next task my Master has for me.  I never go alone, but I will never stop going either.  This may not illuminate the road ahead, but it does inspire me to fit my pack for carrying, and load it with adventurers gear, healing supplies, and my Master's armor with weapons.  I may not know exactly where I'm headed, but I will be ready to move, failure, success, or in between.