Tenacity as a Spiritual Quality

My dad referred to me as persistent, sometimes.  I have been referred to as patient (less often).  But almost never has the adjective tenacious been used with me.  I'm not sure if that's good or bad in most cases, but I believe that having that quality in my faith in Jesus would be a good.  Tenacious really gets at the quality of adhesiveness, or the ability of one thing to stick to another.  So, depending on what those things are, we get various qualities or shades of meaning.

If the "things" are my faith and Jesus, then my faith is completely without reservation stuck in a complete and total manner, no gaps, no bubbles, no strings, but complete emeshment on some chemical or elemental bonding level (never was good at chemistry, so if I messed that description up...get over it and move on).  The idea would perhaps include the sense of baptism in that baptism means to immerse, except that baptism quality implies staying in that condition, and I would drown if left baptized in water.  If my faith becomes so adhered to the object of my faith, then the two can become indistinguishable.  Is this what is meant in Scripture that we become more like Jesus?

I have to admit that I am certainly not "tenacious" in my faith, as even a casual observer of my daily life would be able to point out.  On the other hand, there are roots and tendrils of this faith which are so pervasive in my life that no one misses them.  I would love to point to these as evidence of some level of tenacity on my part, but I suspect they are more evidence of the tanacity of my Master toward me.  For whatever reason, He will not let me loose.  Why He loves me so tenaciously I cannot fathom.  I have embarrassed Him more times than I can count, tarnished the title of "Christian", and even discredited His ability to change people.

But I believe that part of my general call as a believer is to be tenacious back to my Master.  Fear is not an option.  Total commitment is the only acceptable posture toward Him and His purpose.  There is no question, no doubt, no second guesses, no suspicion there may be a better or safer way.  Those thoughts are not qualities of tenacious faith.  I question when I doubt, I doubt when I fear, I fear when my belief in Who God is and what Jesus has done begins to waiver.  There is not doubt in faith.  I simply act as if what I cannot see, and what I hope to be true IS true.  Faith is activity in every day, every situation, every aspect of life, crisis and routine, home, work, transit, and entertainment. 

I infer a certain amount of "energy" in my understanding of tanacity.  But toward God and faith in Him, tanacity would bring a pervasive peace.  Like a child, I would simply assume it's all true and live that way.  I look at kids and what they believe and sometimes I fear for them; for that day when their hopes are dashed, their aspirations are crushed, and the weight of a sadder, drabber reality settles in on them.  But this naive assurrance is the mark of tenacious faith in Jesus, the peaceful assurrance children have about the world, their parents, and themselves.  That posture toward God would produce such a quality of peace, people would wonder and be confused by me.  That would work.  But how to get there.

Practice makes perfect?  I doubt it.  One man changed that cliche to say, perfect practice makes perfect.  No pressure there!  I can't be perfect, not anymore.  Whatever opportunity I had to be perfect went out the window the day I was born (you've seen what newborns look like, I mean really? Perfect?).  I believe my only chance for tenacious faith is to constantly practice little disciplines that give God opportunites to stretch it.  Like, right now I am waiting.  I know only to wait, worship, and walk before my Master.  I want to know whether to remain where I am, move locally, or move to another state.  The discipline I am learning right now is to give up my desires one way or the other, lead my family to do the same, and have peace about all of the options.  Fear is usually directed at the unknown for me.  So, the discipline is to have peace in the unknown.  I believe that this is supposed be because my peace from my faith will overwhelm my concern for the unknown.  I'll let you know how it goes.  So far, it's kind of up and down.

Strategic Faith?

Strategy is not my strong suit.  Sometimes, I can use tactics to my advantage, but strategy seems to elude me.  At least in online games.  In some ways it also seems true in life.  I don't really think strategically, whether in my job, or investing, or home life, and so on.  Tactically, I can address the crisis of the moment, and do so with a cool head and clear thinking.  Planning ahead, not so much.  There are a several reasons for this, for instance I seem to be constrained to an out-of-sight-out-of-mind thinking pattern.  As a coping mechanism, I try to create self-sustaining systems to address things strategically.

Things that are alive may be self-sustaining to a large degree, but daily life rarely is.  My strategy is silly.  I would say lazy except it can take a lot of work to make a seemingly self-sustaining system.  It may take more work to put such a busted system in place than it would take to simply address the problem in a personal manner.  I am still working on my grasp of and responses to reality.  Denial dies hard.

When it comes to my relationship with God, when I inventory my relationship to my Master, I often find this silly coping mechanism working in the background.  I have tried to create one of those systems I don't have to work on daily to take care of my relationship.  I have pushed the "autopilot" button in the plane rather than take the yoke myself or hand it to Jesus.  I go through my day at work, after a lovely meaningful quiet time, completely ignoring my Savior (unless a crisis arises and I switch to tactical mode).  I expect that the time in the morning simply carry me through the day without any further connection after.

One of the areas I have had to grow in my marriage is the importance of contact with my wife throughout the day.  I have had to accept that this is important to her, and reach out periodically, usually at lunch.  I discovered something.  Not only does it improve our relationship in several ways, but it affects me as well.  I am happier, I have a better sense of what I am doing at work and why (for my family not my boss), and I seem to be more apt to ensure I leave work right when my time is over rather than dawdle. 

What would happen in my day if I included a second helping of time with Jesus?  What if I placed that time strategically within my day to maximize its effects on the rest of the day?  If my contact with my wife has such an effect (not always, but more often than not), what would contact with God do to me and my day?  Again, it would not change the circumstances.  I still have co-workers, managers, and customers, all with their own set of challenges, and that would not change.  But my ability to wrap my mind around those circumstances and personal relationships would definitely be affected by such a planned contact with God.  I could pray more specifically for needs that come up in my life and theirs, I could gain revival to finish the day well.  I could get that additional push to mentally reframe my day, overcome the stress I may have gained from a crazy drive into work, and deal more effectively with silly customer issues.

There is really no end to the possible effects of such contact.  Such a change would be difficult to keep private, so others would most likely know something was up.  Such a change would eat up time I use for my break (and bathroom runs), so might cost me in tangible ways.  Such a change might have other effects I have yet to imagine, and many I couldn't imagine or even notice enough to make a connection. 

I will do it.  I will strategically place in my day another time of peace with God.  I'm not sure how or when, and since I am not necessarily good at strategy, I may need to adjust my initial choice.  I will need to make notes, enter it into my schedule and set an alarm, both to start and to quit (I have a limited time I can be away from my desk for this).  This tactical stuff I can handle.  It's the follow through and maintenance with which I will have difficulty.  I will have to reframe this activity as a way to make myself more available to God, rather than something in and of itself that would make me more holy.  That is the nature of spiritual disciplines, and that is what this must be.