Half A Decade Gone?

Ish-bosheth, Saul's son, was forty years old when he became king over Israel, and he was king for two years. The house of Judah, however, followed David.  The time that David was king in Hebron over the house of Judah was seven years and six months. (2 Samuel 2:10-11 NASB)

David was thirty years old when he became king, and he reigned forty years.  At Hebron he reigned over Judah seven years and six months, and in Jerusalem he reigned thirty- three years over all Israel and Judah. (2 Samuel 5:4-5 NASB)

 One of the curious things about the Bible, sometimes a criticism, is the funky math.  In this instance, we have a king in place over eleven tribes for two years, and David over Judah for seven years and six months.  So what accounts for the five years and six months there was no king over the 11 tribes while David was still over Judah in Hebron?

There are theories about this in various commentaries.  One I have says that the five years were actually when David was over all the tribes but still in Hebron, he just hadn't moved to Jerusalem yet.  But that's not what it says here.  It says over Judah for seven years six months...in Hebron.  The other commentary I have totally ignores the issue, which I wasn't happy about.

Left to my own devices I used Google...again I came up empty.  And I did try to use Scripture to comment on Scripture and went to 1 Chronicles 10, 11 and 12.  That editor completely skipped the whole issue, and doesn't even mention Ish-Bosheth (or Eshbaal) reigning at all.  In fact there, after listing four sons previously, it says all three sons died and all of his house (1 Chronicles 10:6), leaving very little room for any such problem.

So what happened to five years?  That's half a decade, you can't just leave it out can you?  It's not just 'water under the bridge' or 'the blink of an eye' or some other cliche.  It's five circuits around the sun.  It's five harvest times, sixty-something new moons, and at least twenty major feasts among the people.  It's nearly the whole time a person can indenture themselves as a slave to pay off a debt.

Okay, so here's my spin on it, within the vacuum of comment or complete failure to notice: I think the other tribes were in nearly complete disarray after Saul's demise, and it took five years to pull something together and put it in place.  I think David waited patiently for God to bring the other tribes over to him, and in that time Abner went around putting together support for Ish-Bosheth, and it took five years.  Well, five years and six months anyway.

Here's why:  Time for us happens fast, and we filter everything through that experience and expectation.  But these people went through longer periods of time with no leader.  As one Judge would die, there would be another 'power vacuum' and eventually another Judge would arise.  So, Samuel dies, as Saul is king, but when Saul dies, there's confusion as to what to do next.  Did the whole king thing fail?  Do we get a judge?  Meanwhile, 'there was no king in the land and everyone did what was good in their own eyes' (Judges 21:25). 

I guess my point is that to us, five years is this big deal.  To them though, things moved slower anyway.  Sure David went from Ziklag to Hebron, but even that probably took time after Saul's death.  David probably used that time to send 'bribes' to the leaders of Judah which smoothed his assumption of power there (1 Samuel 30:26-30).  David bides his time.  He's not worried.  He won't force the issue because he has faith, and I'm sure he doesn't relish trying to take the throne by force.  That would set a precedent of chaos between kings.  He's wise.  He's taught his men that they do not raise their hand against the Lord's anointed, and the lesson stuck.  Why would he turn around and endanger the eventual succession of his own throne through violence?

Faith and patience are not my strongest suits.  I get impatient and wonder what happened to God.  I've been in my job for over 8 years, and haven't been able to jump ship.  What I know is that my Master has me here in this position.  I need to be patient, and diligent as I wait.  David was patient and diligent as he waited for God to bring about what He promised.  And eventually He did.  David didn't complain, "What took you so long?" He didn't look at the chaos of the other tribes (if there was any) and complain, "How long will you wait while this madness continues?"  He did none of that.  I probably would have.  Of course he fought a bear by grabbing him by the beard and clubbing him to death, and I wouldn't do that either...we are quite a bit different really.

My point here is that the lesson of five missing years is patience and faith.  Or it's faith and patience.  Or it's love, which includes both (1 Corinthians 13).  I need to relax into my Master's mighty hands.  I need to stop trying to make much out of my little, when the One making everything out of nothing has me in His view.  It's okay, He's got this, whatever this is.

So critics will look at five missing, unaccounted for, ignored years and yell 'foul!', 'major biblical error!', and so on.  But I take it as a note of encouragement that my view of time is so vastly different from my Master's view of time.  The adjustment I need to make isn't to find an account for the time, but rather to submit to the view of the Master of all time.  If it doesn't bother Him, I shouldn't let it bother me.  Now, about those commentators totally ignoring the issue - THAT I still have an issue with...

So, I Was On My Way To Damascus...

"But it happened that as I was on my way, approaching Damascus about noontime, a very bright light suddenly flashed from heaven all around me, and I fell to the ground and heard a voice saying to me, 'Saul, Saul, why are you persecuting Me?'  And I answered, 'Who are You, Lord?' And He said to me, 'I am Jesus the Nazarene, whom you are persecuting.' (Acts 22:6-8 NASB)

Paul had faced mobs all over Asia and Europe, and now, as he faces this one in Jerusalem, he gives his "defense" as he calls it.  We would call it a "testimony".  It's typically made up of what our lives were like before submitting to Jesus, how we did that, and then what our lives were like after.  He's giving what is probably a common story for him to tell.  He's done it in nearly every Synagogue from Judea through Greece.  Here he includes some local flavor, his return to Jerusalem and vision in the Temple, and so on.  But he never gets to finish.

As soon as he mentions God sending him far away to the Gentiles the mob starts up again.  The funny thing about this is that earlier, in Chapter 21, the commander couldn't get any consistent story from the crowd about what Paul had done to spark such a riot.  They seem pretty clear that it has to do with Gentiles, regardless of what other details they don't know.  What sparked the riot was the claim that Paul had brought Gentiles into the Temple by some Asian Jews.  That much seemed to be known by all or most.

The problem with Paul's testimony is that God includes Gentiles.  That's a real cultural and political problem for Jews.  Their survival has been based on being the Chosen People.  If God is also choosing Gentiles, then their standing before God is endangered, or so they think.  The problem is that they have turned a corner in their relationship with their Master.  They have "possessed" God rather than being possessed by Him.

This is a problem I see in my own life.  I am very skeptical of most religious ideas, practices, and people.  I've had these told to me all my life, only to find that the Scriptures weren't so pat and tidy.  The ideas, practices, and people of my religious youth were not always like what I read in Scripture for myself.  It tainted me, and I became cynical about church, religion, and practice.  I saw it segregating groups of people along racial lines, denominational line, social lines, and even educational lines.  It was not what I saw in Scripture, or at least what I saw was taught against, used as negative examples; what not to do.

But the problem was, I became my own "group".  One of the practices I saw and with which I should have disagreed I embraced instead.  I was proud of my viewpoint.  Those that differed in my view of Scripture I held in contempt.  I became those of whom I was cynical.  I became exclusive, not by telling others they couldn't be a part of "my group" but being rude to those who didn't.  My group was my group.  I missed out on being in my Master's group.

I think that I am in a much better place, theologically, than when I was raised, but all of us should be, and most are (if you think about it, even new adult believers are).  The other problem with these unscriptural viewpoints around which I was raised is that they were also exclusive.  The problem that the Jewish mob had that caused them to stop listening and throw cloaks and dust in the air, that was my problem too; and sadly still is sometimes.

Lately, in the last several years, I have intentionally chosen fringe and unpopular views of Scripture, all within the bounds of conservative Biblical views, but out there.  I know they are not all right, but I'm waiting for the discussion on the topic.  Because on the other side of it are a few things I really want.  One of the minor ones is clarity.  It's over rated with God, since He's Holy, but it's nice to gain a bit more clarity when possible.  Another one is perspective, which is something I can never gain on my own with just my own view through my knot-hole.  But two other important ones are the most often missed.  I gain fellowship with those involved in the discussion, and therefore with my Master who pulls us all together.

I have discovered that when I cast my cloak and throw dust, I'm pulling away from a relationship with my Master, and possibly some of His other servants.  Not every viewpoint is derived from Scripture, and not every viewpoint derived from Scripture handles Scripture correctly.  But with the bounds of rightly-handled Scripture there is much room for viewpoints and discussion.  If I can let go of my fear, pride, and resentment I'm pretty sure I can find a lot of fellow servants with whom to fellowship. 

Living in Belief From Enlightenment Past

There are times when I have lucid moments with my Master.  He shows me something and I get it, I see it, it makes sense, and I get excited (because they’re rare).  What Chambers writes about here is making use of those times to act on that experience on the way down or out of it.  I should not be amazed at how often that I fail exactly at that point.  I am so shocked to be in the moment, it fades before I act and then I don’t act since it passed. 

I have had some very lucid moments, and I have had times of semi-lucidness, and so on.  But the common element to each of them is the sense of truth.  I would have a revelation of something new (to me) about my Master, or about my relationship with Him, or insight about needs of those around me.  While in ministry, it was easy to act on them, since that was expected.  Now it is unusual, and somewhat disruptive, possibly embarrassing or vulnerable.  But those times, since they are from my Master, are also calls to action.  Chambers is exactly right there.  The passage he uses is John 12:36, and this passage follows the resurrection of Lazarus after being dead over three days.  The people around Jerusalem want to see the One who raised Lazarus.  The Elders want to kill Jesus and Lazarus.

While on His way into Jerusalem, the Father speaks audibly in response to Jesus, Greeks seek Him, and He speaks of the sort of death He will suffer.  John makes the comment that though Jesus had performed this sign of raising Lazarus, they still did not believe in Him.  Jesus says to them, “While you have the light believe the light.”  The light, one of several thematic references in John, will be leaving; and with Him, an opportunity, a “kyretic” moment will pass.  The people have an opportunity to respond to Jesus as their Master, but they are to tightly married to their desire for a political king.  They can see only as far as their subservience to Rome, not their slavery to sin.  This is me.

When I get so distracted by my woes at work, am I any different than these souls who witnessed the death of the Creator?  When I lose my cool driving eight miles in traffic, am I better off or clearer of vision than they were?  How about when I get angry with my daughter because she was mean to me instead of using that as a teachable moment to calmly provide guiding consequences?  Or when I am sarcastic or cynical with my wife over some meaningless comment or action, am I still in touch with the amazing revelation of grace of my Master?  Does the reality of the Savior with which I have been provided sink below my conscious into the fiber of my personality?  When I am by myself, no one sees what I do, I feel the tendrils of my old behavior and I wish for it, whether I give in or not, that I wish for it shames me!  Jesus loves me, He has my back, and I am at His service.  Yet when I do these things, I stand over His cross, hammer and spike in hand, ready to add another stroke to his pain.

What do I believe, and what do I do, and do they match?  What light have I been given, and is it fading?  And when it fades, what will I do then?  Will I believe still, will I act as if it’s true, and will I continue to obey?  Or will my actions, thoughts, behaviors, and attitudes look more like those who live as if there is no Savior except themselves?  Even now, thoughts move through my mind, memories of things I have seen, things I have done.  Even as I pray in electronic form, my mind still is not clean.  What light do I have, and will I believe while I have it?  Perhaps the term I need to adopt is becoming a “Son bather” and soak up the light of the Son.  I hope for a fourth degree burn to the bone from light of His face, so He can rebuild me from the core in the form He desires.  Wow, sounds painful; like being crucified (Ephesians 2:20).

Oswald Chambers' "My Utmost For His Highest": April 16th.

What’s On My Altar Should Stay on My Altar

“If only…” is a phrase that I try to avoid.  My usual mental response is, “well, it isn’t.”  And I try to focus on what is.  I have to do this with our housing situation.  Right now we have an apartment/storage unit to use once this house closes.  The price is within tolerances of our income, but we wonder if this was really what God was leading us to do.  Well, if it wasn’t, we’re here now.  And what we do, we do from here.  I wonder whether we were truly in the will of my Master.  But really the only reason I go there is because I’m afraid of the present and near future. 

But there are times when my Master brings to my mind the past decisions and choices, and walks me through the “if only…”’s in order to show me a better direction for the future.  It is learning from the past, and it is good, especially when my Master is my Guide through it.  But I have to go completely through it.  I sometimes get distracted by the past and want to take time to grieve my mistake.  A moment will suffice, the future awaits, and this lesson is more important than tears over what cannot be changed.  Only the future holds hope, and it only does so because my Master leads me into it.  I need to catch up and follow through the past, learning the lesson my Master has for me.

In this reading from MUFHH, Chambers refers to the weeping of Jesus over Jerusalem as He enters.  He says if only Jerusalem had known what led to peace.  Instead they were to be destroyed.  Their future was marked by their current blindness, but this continued blindness is because now it has been “hidden” from their eyes.  When I consider that, I shudder.  It is possible for me to remain so blinded to my own “strange god” (as Chambers puts it) that I eventually suffer being blinded.  It smacks of my suffering with addiction.  It is my choice to take that road, but it eventually takes over and I no longer have a choice.  I needed no help to get into it, but I need help to get out.  This “strange god” works the same way, and could be sneaky enough to fly under my “addiction radar”, missed because I was looking for something else.  Yet, addictions are strange gods as well. 

So, the type of problem is similar, and my radar can be tuned to catch them.  I just, as always, need to allow my Master to work the controls on the radar.  It helps me, He doesn’t really need it.  He simply uses whatever sensitivity I have to point out what He is ready to change.  He wants my compliance with it, inviting me into the process, always respecting my boundaries, but also leaving me with the responsibility for obedience and submission.  Once again, I have a responsibility.  Again, this responsibility is not to become acceptable, but rather in response to being accepted.  In some sense, my responsibility is to remain still and let my Master perform surgery.  But in another sense, my responsibility is to witness courageously the revelation of my “strange god” and surrender it.

Again, this is part of the purpose of these entries.  I respond to areas of my life which my Master reveals, confess them publicly, and surrender them to my Master before witnesses.  In secret I can easily rescue my idol from the altar before it is completely destroyed.  In public, it is more difficult.  What keeps me from “slight of hand” (distracting with the next entry what I said I would give up in the previous one) is that some of you follow a ways behind, reading and commenting on previous entries a week or more after I wrote them.  Now that’s accountability.  That’s excellent!  It is good for me to go back and re-read older entries, and I need to take some time to review them to ensure I am familiar with where I am supposed to be.  But that other do that as well is a layer of accountability I have never had before, and I like it!  For some reason, instead of intrusive, it feels freeing and exciting (isn’t that weird?).  So, thank you again to whoever finds this page, and reads these words, whenever you read them.  Hopefully when that happens, when you catch up with where I am in my journey, you find me struggling with different things, and these “strange gods” just ashes.

Oswald Chambers' "My Utmost For His Highest": April 3rd.